New Week Resolution

Damn, how I hate myself for realizing how long it’s actually been since my last post?  After officially getting married, life has definitely thrown me some curve balls, as it usually does, and has gotten in the way of my blogging.  I woke up this morning, groggy, tired, wanting nothing more than to spend the rest of the day in bed… but after my shower and drive in to work – well I decided to take a new view on this week.  Instead of a New Years Resolution, I made a New Week resolution for myself.  My resolution is to sort through my Things To Do List and organize/prioritize and obviously do as many as I can.

My busy time is kind of over as of end of last week since we got our 10Q report filed.  We had family events, birthdays, get together that took up family time.  My mom was out of town on vacation for the past two weeks.  As I mentioned, the marriage had a few curve balls thrown at it which gave Mrs. Z and I some time to reflect on what is our next step in life.  What I really want to make sure to do is be able to get back to providing advice, feedback, guidance on how to make life work for you – specifically marriage, being a parent, being healthy, and trying to enjoy each day.  If you aren’t enjoying each day, than in turn I believe you are wasting each day which is unacceptable.  Now trust me, I have bad days too – more often than I would like.  But I keep trying to improve this.  I keep working toward making each day count.

Let’s go back to the topic.  New Week Resolution.  The more I think about it, the more I realize what a great concept that could be.  The problem with a New Years Resolution is it is too long.  Most people can start New Years Resolution, they get excited about getting fit, or eating more healthy, or working harder, making more money, starting a new hobby.  The list goes on and on.  Well after some time, this resolution seems too far away and a majority of the people – I would guess to say 99% quit or give up, or perhaps adjust their resolution.  Well, what if, instead of year resolution… I create a new weekly resolution.  Each week, I can either continue to get something done OR create a new one, or adjust an old one, or add on to the Resolution List.  I can review how I did each week, reflect and move forward.  Here is the best part, if something didn’t work, you can start again next week.  If your new years resolution didn’t work, most people feel no obligation to start until next year.  If we do this on a weekly basis, perhaps the results will vary.

I’m excited to share my weekly resolutions with you and my progress of what I can get accomplished.  One of the resolutions definitely being that I will be sharing more.  Look forward to any feedback, responses and ideas for New Week Resolution.

Max 11.11.2013

More Views and Hits

 

It’s probably been a month since we started this blog and I can’t wait to get more people to view it.  I’m not exactly sure how to do it, but I know we will get there.  I know it takes time.  It takes patience.  I have it.  I want it.  I think this may be a perfect opportunity to recap some of the posts from this week, perhaps I should do this on a weekly basis but we’ll see what happens.  So many more topics to write about – I wish there was more days in the week –

Sacrifice

Wedding Thank You Speech

My Girls – I am lucky!!!

Follow Through

I hate bad news…

Wake Up & Create More Time

These are great reads and they are quick and they will provide good advice.  I promise.  Follow me, the more followers I get – the more motivated I get.  Our wedding is in a week.  I will be providing a play by play of next weeks events, including the wedding.

Stay tuned…

08.31.13 – Max

Wedding – my thank you speech?

My wedding is exactly a week away. We have done a lot of planning, finalizing this week and we still have a ton to do. I hope for it to be all worth it for the bride to be and have the day be as magical as she dreams it. On a separate note, as I was sitting at work a couple of days ago, I decided to write a standard “thank you for coming” speech that as the groom I can say next week. Basically, thanking everyone for coming out, blah blah blah. I wanted to post it on here and see if I would get any feedback and if anyone has any suggestions. As I mention, I want it short and sweet so here it is.

Hi everyone. I’ll make this short and sweet – I needed some help with giving a thank you speech, so I did the only thing I can think of – I googled it and it basically laid out exactly what I need to say so here it goes.

On behalf of my wife and I, can’t believe I just said that after 11 years, we’d like to thank you all for coming here today and sharing our special day with us. It’s good to be surrounded by people who are important to us, and to see them all in one day coming together just for us is a great feeling. We hope that you’re enjoying tonight as much as we are, I mean we’ve had open bar for an hour or so now but I’m sure we’ll get there (hopefully laughter). We would like to thank you everyone for your kind wishes cards, gifts and support and are so grateful and appreciative of it all.

We would like to thank our wedding party for all your help in organizing this little get together. We definitely couldn’t do it without you. We would also like to thank…

Chuck & Peggy (bride parents) – thank you for everything!!! Thank you for giving me your daughters hand in marriage that you raised wonderfully because you got her to like a guy like me. I promise to, as I have, continue taking care of her – even though she might organic me to death. Peggy, this also gives me an opportunity to say thank you for all time you spend with our girls, we honestly can’t thank you enough. Chuck, just so you know – I will continue to learn as much as I can from you so that we won’t have to call you every time we have to remodel the bathroom, paint the rooms or in my case – change a light bulb.

Momma Max (my moms) – I don’t have enough words to thank you – You all know me for the amazing and wonderful person that I am, BUT I couldn’t have done it without this woman over there. I know how much you have sacrificed for me and you have always been understanding with me no matter how much trouble I may have gotten in. Thank you so much and I love you more than you know. Now let me attempt to translate this to Russian, especially for my grandfather. (speak in Russian)

My best man, Akash (AK), first of all, thanks for the kind words (improvise). Not many people know this guy as well as I do, even though this guy doesn’t show it, his heart is bigger than anyone I know. He has been here for me through thick and thin and it means the world to me. I wouldn’t be where I am without him. So Thank you and I love you.

And finally, the bridesmaids, thanks for calming Katie’s nerves and helping her in preparation today – I can only imagine the past 12 hours have been quite interesting. But thank you and she looks absolutely stunning.

I will be cheesy for a moment and say I am the luckiest guy in the world today as I stand here next to the most beautiful woman in the world. Katie and I have had our special time in high school, college, after college and the past 5 years with our beautiful Ava & Zoey who have just been the absolute joy of our lives. I believe the key to our relationship has been forgiveness and love and it will continue to be love and support no matter what. So I love you and I look forward to growing old together for another 100 years. I expect to live at least that long with all the money we spend on organic food soooo … seriously though, I love you.

We have so many others that have had huge influences in our lives and we would both like to thank you again for everything. Let’s enjoy the rest of the evening and I know all the guests we invited here can probably drink this bar dry so don’t let me down and everyone have a good time and be safe. – Cheers

Let me know what you think and don’t forget – follow our blog as we will continue to share our story, provide advice for relationships, tips and how to stay together forever no matter what obstacles you may come into or we will just tell you to dump your significant other – either way – lots more content coming.

08.30.13 – Max

Goodnight

It’s after midnight.  It’s bedtime, but I’m feeling excited.  I’m feeling optimistic.  I feel good.  Why?  I believe this blog will provide insight to individuals looking for advice for relationships, looking for optimistic views, looking for positive vibes.

My fiance hasn’t written much but she has had a view posts which worth reading which you can find under the Girl P.O.V.  We’ve had a full day of more wedding finalization for our big day next week.  We met with the DJ tonight which I will write about tomorrow but it was great, it made me realize that this is actually happening, I will be marrying someone I have known over 11 years, yet I feel nervous.  As I see her sleeping, I keep thinking what a lucky dude I am.  A great mother to my kiddos and my best friend.

If you are with your significant other, no matter the circumstances, no matter what fight you may have gotten into – give him or her a kiss on the forehead if they are sleeping and let them know you love them no matter what.  This was a goodnight and I’m ready for tomorrow.

08.29.13 – Max

Weekend Bachelor Party

My wedding is less than two weeks away.  My bride to be is ready to pull her hair out.  Per my post from yesterday My Wedding… 2 Weeks Away. – I am trying to be as stress free as I can and just enjoy every moment of everyday.

But before I officially tie the knot, I did have a Bachelor Party to attend last weekend.  For those of you who have not read this blog, my fiance and I do have two beautiful daughters and have been together for 11+ years.  Not sure where to begin.  My best man sent me a text a couple of weeks before the “Bachelor Party” letting me know what the plan was for August 17th and August 18th.  A full weekend (48 hours) of getting into shenanigans with your “bros.”  This a weekend which every groom to be gets jacked up for.  Ready to put on the Macho Man face and prove to his buddies one final time that you still have it in you.  A bachelor party, an ultimate night/weekend of a guy just being a guy with his friends.

My view on the weekend was different, probably because of my situation.  My views on life and relationships may be different.  I DO NOT believe your bachelor party should be your “last hoorah” or your final party with your guys.  I believe a relationship needs to be three parts – the Team, You, Her.  A family four parts – the Team, You, Her & Kid(s) – more on all of this in a different post.  My point is you and your partner need to have separate lives and I want to go hang with the guys (watch football, drink beers, play sports) – you do it, with permission from the Miss of course.  We both work hard, we both are great parents to our kiddos, we both take the time to spend time with each other and we both need our alone time too as these are all keys to a healthy relationship.  So as the Bachelor Party weekend was approaching, I was definitely excited but mostly because it was going to be another weekend to just hang with my friends and relax.  I know from experience that a night out or weekend away really helps me recharge to be a dad, recharge to be a kick ass employee and most importantly be a good partner in crime to my fiance.

So getting back on track, my bachelor party consisted of attending a Cubs rooftop (all you can eat and drink), we headed to our hotel (Hard Rock) where we consumed a few beverages and headed to dinner which was delicious.  I ate a burger with a delicious patty and topped with Italian Beef.  Afterwards we attended a few open bars in the city.  I won’t get into too much detail but I fairly enjoyed getting together with my groups of friends, some that didn’t know each other, I thought we all just had a great time that night.  There was however, a Part II for a few of us.  My friends took me to Wisconsin Dells for a night.  We left early the next morning and spend the day laying out, eating, enjoying the water slides (where I am pretty sure I bruised/broke my left rib), and taking a nap.  That night we spent quite a bit of time at the Casino and than a few bars which weren’t very crowded but the weather was perfect to sit around a bonfire smashing beers and taking shots with friends I love.

I couldn’t have asked for a better weekend.  I got to do everything I wanted and once I got back I was re-charged ready to go till the wedding got here.  The one thing I did learn about myself on this trip.  My 2nd night, I really missed my girls.  My 4 year old and almost 2 year old were on my mind quite a bit.  I hated knowing this would be the 2nd night that I wouldn’t be sleeping in the same house as them which made me think… my future wife and I are going on a 4 night honeymoon.  Thinking about this gives me anxiety and I don’t get anxious easily.  I guess the 1st step will be to get through the wedding : )

I couldn’t thank my best man and best friends enough for the great weekend I had and I made sure to let them know multiple times how much I appreciated it.  But as I said before, I don’t believe it needs to be a Bachelor Party.  I believe once in a while, your guy or girl just needs some time to relax with friends and when that times comes, encourage it.  It’ll make your relationship that much stronger.  I would know because it’s been 11 years and we are still going “Till Death (Blog) Do Us Part”.

08.27.13 – Max

Damn You (or thank you?), Walt Disney!

So here I am. It’s late in the evening, my fiance is away for his bachelor party weekend with the guys, the kids are fast asleep from their fun day grocery shopping and visiting-the-grandparents-with-mom day. I would like to take a time out from the hectic day to day responsibilities and just sit down and write an honest post about my future husband and our relationship these days. Here goes nothin’!

It’s 11 years and counting since we’ve met, and just a couple months less than that, that we have been dating. It hasn’t always been all ‘hearts & flowers’ (to quote the super trendy E.L James novel I’m sure the ladies will know). We started dating when I was heading into junior year of high school, he-his senior year. There were plenty of ons & sort-of-offs; fights and jealousies. In the first about, 5 years, I grew to resent those times, even though my now-fiance kept telling me that no matter what happened, in the end it would make us stronger. Teenager that I was kept denying that fact as I always thought for my whole life that a relationship was supposed to be like a Disney princess movie. It never occured to me that some day I wouldn’t go riding off into the sunset with my prince to our beautiful Cinderella style castle. I of course watched The Little Mermaid and Cinderella one too many times, but that’s a blog post for another day. Moving on…

During the rough times through those years and even on up through the births of our 2 beautiful daughters, we would always come to a point in a heated conversation where he would say, ‘we aren’t compatible, we are completely different.’ Back in the day I would always want to disagree with that statement because I thought that being  completely different than one another was a bad thing and meant that we shouldn’t be together. Now as we grow older together, experience all that life has thrown at us regarding our children, finances, daily struggles in life, family, etc., I realize that for us personally- it is a WONDERFUL thing. Let me explain in further detail.

For me personally, my husband is everything I wish that I could be. He is lively, outgoing, charismatic, charming and silly. In a business sense he is smart, loyal and motivated; hardworking almost to a fault. During family time he is as fun as can be yet gets things accomplished. I often watch in amazement (while he thinks I’m staring off into space or in another room cleaning), while he playfully swings our girls in his arms as they giggle to the point of hiccups. Then somehow he transitions that into a laundry-folding-dance-party to our favorite adult tunes that the kids have a newfound love for (why don’t they love it during my karaoke sessions on the car ride to school?!). Somehow, this kind of thing never happens for me. My days with the kids seem to happen like I am going through an acted out to-do list. Diaper, bottle, breakfast, potty time for #2, brush teeth time, poopy diaper change, snack time in the middle of mommy-tries-do-the-dishes-time, someone spills snack all over kitchen floor and tromps it all the way to the bedroom and smashes the crumbs into the rugs which leads to mommy vaccuum time in the middle of dishes time, and it goes on. I also feel like I haven’t found my nitche in the business world and I work just as hard as the next guy but I don’t go way above and beyond like I should. He makes me strive to be a better person and mother. A better friend and employee. I feel like he is constantly teaching me about myself and about others and I find myself worshipping him like my own personal philosopher. Sometimes when I get into a Disney princess mode about a personal tiff with a friend or a work related annoyance, he snaps me back to reality and out of my daydream. We come up with logical and sensible ways to deal with it instead of just expecting people to be something they are not, or situations to disappear if I ignore them long enough. As much as I want my love fest for my husband to continue, I’d also like to believe that I am complimentary to his personality traits as well.

I am observant, quiet, goofy and loving. I believe that we should work to live and not live to work. I like to go see and conquer the world and he is more of a homebody, content on our tiny patio having a chat under the stars (or the balcony above us). I am a human scheduler, often reminding the family of meal time and appointment time. If it were up to my loving loverpants, the family may grow up on McGMO’s Hashbrown breakfasts and salami sandwiches. If he is having an issue with a relative or friend or coworker, I am the one who looks beyond the exterior. I read into and analyze situations and people in a way that he does not. I am the handyman of the house, the pest control, and the main boo-boo mender. Taking all of these (& more) differences into account, we have been able to turn a would be struggle into a learning experience. The fact that we continue to accept, learn, grow and most of all love eachother for what we are as human beings and not instead for what we dreamt up with the help of another persons idea in cartoon form (damn you Disney!), or how we think society is telling us our relationship should be, is the reason we are getting married in two weeks. As we see and know, divorce and separation, bitterness and resentment is all too common in the world these days. I believe that if all people were to truly open their hearts and minds, unguard themselves & forget all of the relationship/love propaganda of yesteryear, we may see a change in those stats. Sometimes it’s easier for people to walk away than to really try to truly understand their partner or to concede and see things in a different light. Sometimes it’s easier for someone to find comfort somewhere else than it is to hash out their differences and work it out and have those difficult conversations. We’ve had plenty of those conversations and I’m sure we will have plenty more but I know that because of our differences, not in spite of them, we will forge our path through a loving marriage. Sometimes people, our differences are what keeps us together. Some of us are too focused on the wrong things to take a step back and notice it. Some may be too stubborn to accept it.

To my soon to be husband, I love you with all of my heart and with everything that I am. I love all of the ways that you push me and teach me. I love that you are everything that I wish I could be and I hope that I am that to you. I can’t wait for 85 more years of learning, loving, and creating our family memories. All those times you said the hard times just make us stronger, you were right. We are stronger than ever and it can only continue from here. We make eachother better people in ways I never even thought possible and I can’t even begin to thank you for just simply being you. Every single day I am a better person because of you. I love you more than I can verbally or physically express. I can’t wait for 9-6-13.

About Us

My fiance and I will be getting married in exactly one month from today.  We have been together for over 11 years.  We have two beautiful daughters, 4 years old and 1.5 years old.  We have lived together for over 5 years.  We are both in our mid to late 20s.  We have decided to create this blog to tell others about the journey we have been on and long journey still ahead of us.

We want to provide relationship advice, parenting advice, life advice, health advice – we want to be your 1st stop for any assistance or help you may need in your personal life.

We believe the reason we can provide the best advice to anyone is because of the experience we have been through.  The best part is you will also be able to get a Male v Female perspective.  We look forward to sharing our story.

We are still in the process of creating the appearance of the site, so give it some time.  My fiance is the artsy one so I will let her take the lead on this.

-Max. 08.07.13